The Greatest Christmas Gifts of All Time


Eric Lanzer, Co-Editor in Chief

In this article, I will tell you about some of the best gifts to give your girlfriend/significant other! This will be your number-one guide to getting your girlfriend the perfect gift!  


  1. A Private Island- Essentially, you will have to spend every penny in your pocket and take out plenty of loans, but it will be a great gift for your significant other! You can both live on the island and you would see each other all the time. You would also benefit from this gift because you can live on the private island as well! 


  1. Crocs- Crocs are an essential part of daily life. They are so stylish and they might be the greatest shoe of all time! If you discount their terrible looks with random holes all over the shoe, they are a steal. They don’t cost much, and you can make your significant other look like every other person in Ohio!


  1. The Gift of Cheating- Let me tell you, from first-hand experience, one of the best gifts/things you could do for your significant other is to cheat on them! They will appreciate this gift because of the moral values it displays. They will also appreciate the uphill battle you face after cheating and trying to rekindle your relationship. 


  1. Tattoo- A tattoo will instantly connect you with your partner and grow your relationship. A tattoo of your initials or your name would be a great idea for your significant other especially if you are in high school! Your relationship will instantly be solidified because they can never leave you, if they do, they will face much embarrassment of their tattoo forcing them to stay with you forever! 


  1. A Different Significant Other- This gift works great because it goes along with number three, cheating. If you get them another significant otSher and cheat on them it will be like two gifts in one! Clearly, you aren’t doing enough for them, so get them someone that can be there for them and aid them in their needs! 


These are the greatest gifts to get for your significant other for Christmas or really any holiday!