A big part of high school is learning to overcome and adapt to changes you have no control over. Life can get unbelievably overwhelming at such a young age in our current world. With social media and self-diagnosis running rampant through teenage social circles, it’s hard to feel normal and learn healthy coping mechanisms. I, along with many others, know firsthand what it’s like to unknowingly drown yourself in a sea of distractions. From sports to clubs to AP classes, it gets tough to keep going. Adults pretend to understand, and I’m sure some truly do, but many people out there blame it all on the one drowning (as if they aren’t contributing to the sea). I’d like to use the voice I was given, to throw anyone in need of it, a lifeboat.
Recently, I’ve noticed that many of my friends are struggling with the same common problems. It’s hard to sit by and watch when you relate and feel for them so deeply when you know that you can’t do much other than wait and listen. So many teenagers, younger and younger every year might I add, are getting diagnosed with severe mental illnesses. Some may say we have it too easy now and kids are getting softer, but I’d argue the opposite. In the past, many people didn’t even graduate from high school because they knew they could get by without a diploma. Now it seems that you need every degree from Havard to get anywhere. However, I digress because worrying about college is the absolute very last thing I’d like to do.
Back to high school being borderline traumatizing, it’s supposed to be the greatest years of your life! High school is about learning and growing and sometimes those lessons are forced. Some of the toughest parts of school have nothing to do with applications and exams. For most, it’s the unrequited drama. I hate to diminish it because not all drama is elementary-level snitching, sometimes it feels like life or death. High school is for first loves and heartbreaks and friendships unfortunately changing. Losing a friend is very rough to deal with and can feel like the end. I promise you it is not. I asked my long-time friend, Shelby Walton, what she thought about changing friendships and she had this to say, “I think a big reason people lose friends is simply drifting apart. This doesn’t mean that either party is in the wrong, they’ve just outgrown each other.” I think it’s very important to understand that just because you’ve stopped hanging out with someone, doesn’t mean you did anything wrong. It’s a very hard pill to swallow but sometimes, you just have to accept it for what it is. Growing apart might be the worst kind of heartbreak, depending on how you look at it. It’s the least expected so the realization that it’s happening or has happened is always ten times worse than a fight you knew was coming.
Letting go of people, especially friends you thought you’d have forever, is incredibly tough. My heart goes out to everyone who’s ever had to go through it whether it was due to a death, a fight, or simply getting older; no certain circumstances make it easier than another. Just remember that you are allowed to grieve the death of a relationship for however long you need to.
I’ve always hated the saying if you love it let it go because I believe the exact opposite is true. If you care at all, you fight; you put your blood, sweat, and tears into fighting for who you love whether they ask you to or not because that’s what it means to care. Life is too short to not give all you have, and I know that’s super corny and cringy, but it’s true. Sometimes though, you fight until you beat yourself and that’s when the real pain hits. As much as I suggest you put your all into caring for someone, it can get to a point where you can only do so much. If you feel like you’re praying to a brick wall, take a step back until it becomes a mirror. You will see that it does get better and the right people will come back around. If it’s meant to be, it will, and the ocean really doesn’t go on forever.
High school has been so much fun, and I’ll be very sad to see it go in a few years. Even though it has been filled with more twists and turns than Stephen King could conjure up, it’s worth it. Please don’t give up because one day you’ll wish you could go back.
