This article started with the hope of having a detailed list of sweet tea ratings. However, as fate would have it, life got in the way as it often does. Exams, papers, and sporting events trumped the sweet tea competition. Alas, Declan Gray, a senior, and I tested Chick-fil-A drinks alongside Emmy Daniel.
Declan and I have quite an affinity for sweet tea, while Emmy, horrifyingly, hates the taste of freshly brewed black tea with scoops of sugar that make even the most sour-faced person smile. Declan and I ventured to McDonald’s during spring break after a chamber orchestra rehearsal. I had just flown in from my quick trip down south the morning before our time together.
My eyes had been open since four in the morning, yet I was rejuvenated as I sat in his car and tested the most famous McDonald’s sweet tea. We sat in his infamous car with its flurry of takeout order stickers on the glove compartment while his backup camera was obscured with his closest friends’ knick-knacks.
His car also embodied his soul, so his music played softly throughout the car as I patiently waited for his expert opinion on the McDonald’s sweet tea. I rated it an impressive 9.725 out of 10 while Declan pondered his own rating. Eventually, after a near millennia, he uttered an outstanding “8.7 out of 10.”
After the rating, we meandered through the wildly impressive towns of Dover and New Philadelphia, flowing in and out of neighborhoods while sharing random stories and laughs. By the end, we had encountered two gargantuan raccoons who hissed at us as we drove by.
A week later, Declan, Emmy, and I wandered our way up to North Canton, a densely populated sector of Ohio that I thoroughly enjoyed. We browsed through Books a Million and then Target as we scrounged for snacks and Squishmallows before heading to Chick-fil-A. As we ordered, I was delighted that Declan ordered a sweet tea, so we could rate another drink for this very article.
This took much deliberation as the first sip was not enjoyable nor entirely terrible. I rated it a healthy 6.5 out of 10, while Declan first rated it an excellent 5.8 out of 10. Shortly after taking a sip, Emmy declared that the drink only garnered a 3/10, while it took Declan about two more hours to marinate in the decision and finally land on about a 3.5/10.
The following week, we found ourselves in Canton again after a fear-inducing trip to an air compressor so Declan could fill his low tires. The trio had a mission to buy Emmy a special edition Hello Kitty stuffed animal from Build a Bear. So, as Emmy found a new stuffed animal to take home, Declan and I attempted to conceal our amazement at the rest of the animals available for purchase. I had not been in the store since I was seven, but found the Hello Kitty plushies adorable.
After this excursion, we found ourselves inevitably in the Books a Million, purely for my enjoyment, before ending the Canton trip in Chick-fil-A. The three of us ordered the famous lemonade while unknowingly rating it throughout the night. Emmy enjoyed her drink in silent bliss as she made no complaint about the beverage while Declan visibly and audibly winced every time he took a sip. He regarded the drink as “far too sour” and found himself sticking to Fair Lemonade from then on. I enjoyed the Chick-fil-A lemonade in the way people enjoy sandwiches: there was no genuine dislike or enjoyment of the drink. I drank it out of near obligation because we were in a Chick-fil-A, and it felt like a requirement.
This concludes the half-baked sweet tea competition, with McDonald’s taking the cake as the best sweet tea all around. While there wasn’t specific documented evidence of the rest of the sweet tea Declan and I have indulged in, there is no doubt that there have been more locations with sweet tea that were either bad or good. However, I cannot remember extremely memorable places at the moment, and I found that the stories along the way of testing the sweet tea would be more enjoyable.
