The Greatest Grade School

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Olivia Patton

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Which grade school is the best? We all have very strong loyalties to our elementary schools and find ours superior to the other two. East kids had the nice track and field day with bouncy houses and javelin throw, Dover Avenue had the awesome zipline on the playground that broke people’s arms, and South kids had their impressive kickball and soccer fields to keep them entertained. Each school had defining aspects that made its students different from the rest.

East was the home to top-notch parties and school functions. East had the fun carnival with all the cool prizes in the library and the bouncy houses. They also had fun pep rallies with games and the pee-wee cheerleaders. When East students were asked about their experience at East they had nothing negative to say. They spoke about how Mr. Compton was a great principal and how the librarian was super fun. They also said that the music teacher had a lot of weird stories, the most notorious being that, one day while she was mowing, a squirrel ran up her pants. East also had the little square scooters in gym class that everyone at Avenue was super jealous of. East’s blatant saying, “East is Beast,” rings in the ears of all East kids.

Dover Avenue was a bit of an oddball of the three\; both East and South had the same structure, and then you had Dover Avenue with its three floors including the basement. Dover Avenue’s playground was all wooden\; therefore, all the students are experts at removing splinters. Music class with Mrs. Clinker was always a good day when they played Little Tommy Tittle Mouse or got to use the keyboards, but the birthday kisses got more embarrassing every year. Dover Ave was the only school that had a guy come in and sell yoyos to all the students. Within a week they banned the yoyos, but that was a good week while it lasted. The motto of Dover Avenue is “Once a Dover Avenue kid, always a Dover Avenue kid” and all Avenue kids still believe this saying.

South has endured being dogged by both Dover Avenue and East kids ever since creation. Perhaps, this is a bit unfair. After all, South had its own benefits and quirks. An anonymous interviewee told me that “If someone steps on the green stair they would have bad luck.” Apparently, if a student were to step on this green stair, they were in big trouble. Though East and South is architecturally the same school, and everything is supposed to be identical, there is one difference, that being the green stair. No matter who was asked about South they all mentioned the green stair and what it stood for. South also had a big orange slide that had secret messages at the top since the teachers couldn’t see them. One pro to South is that they got snow cones on track and field day. Some favorite staff members of the students include Mrs. VanGilder and Mr. Staron. To sum up South in one sentence, Troy Thompson says, “It never disappoints”.

Though the elementary schools are very different, they also have their similarities. One of these similarities is that all the schools participated in AR. We all wanted as many charms as possible and would get in trouble for taking the tests on Dr. Suess books for easy points. Another similarity is that all the schools had one day a year when they would be visited by Jim Basketball Jones. Every student looked forward to the day that Jim Basketball Jones came to their school. Everyone would raise their hand as high as they could so they could be chosen as a volunteer. All of these memories we have of our elementary schools greatly impacted our childhoods. With the grade schools being leveled, it is sad that the future generations of Dover students won’t experience the grade school rivalry.